Top 9 tips for directing an Indian movie

18 ಮೇ

Aspiring to be a director? You direct it, we will provide scenes for you 🙂
Some of them are as listed below, in random order,anyway it works in any sequence 😛
#1 If the number of heroes is not equal to the number of heroines, the excess heroes/heroines will die.
#2 If there are 2 heroes in a movie, they will fight each other savagely for at least 5 minutes
#3 Any court scene will have the dialogue “Objection My Lord!”. If it is said by the hero, or his lawyer, it will be sustained. Else, it will be overruled. 😉
#4 The hero’s sister will usually marry the hero’s best friend (i.e. the second hero). Else, she will be raped by the villain within the 1st 30 minutes, and commit suicide.
#5 In a chase, the hero will always overtake the villain, even on a bullock-cart, or on foot.
#6 When the hero fires at the villain(s), he will never miss or run out of bullets. When the villain fires at the hero, he will always miss (unless the hero is required to die, as in rule).
#7 Any fight sequence shall take place in the vicinity of a stack of pots, barrels and glass bottles which will be smashed to pieces.
#8 Any movie involving lost+found brothers will have a song sung by the brothers their blind mother (but of course, she has to be blind in order to regain her sight in the climax). Will have a family dog/cat.
The amazing thing is that these folks remember the song after 20 years in the movie, and you can’t remember it 2 minutes after coming out of the theater. 😀
#9 Police inspectors (when not played by the hero) come in three categories: 😛
– Scrupulously honest, probably the hero’s father – killed by the villain before the titles.
– Honest, but always chasing the anti-hero (as in rule), saying “Tum kanoon se bach nahin sakte”, only to pat him in the back in reel 23. Usually, this inspector’s daughter is in love with the anti-hero.
– The corrupt inspector, (usually the real villain’s sidekick) unceremoniously knocked about by the hero(s) in the climax.

2 ಟಿಪ್ಪಣಿಗಳು

Posted by on ಮೇ 18, 2007 in movies


2 responses to “Top 9 tips for directing an Indian movie

  1. Mep

    ಮೇ 25, 2007 at 8:50 ಫೂರ್ವಾಹ್ನ

    Well done pammi
    The first point holds in some of English movies also like spiderman 3 🙂

  2. Harsha

    ಡಿಸೆಂಬರ್ 31, 2007 at 2:27 ಅಪರಾಹ್ನ



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